Monday, November 15, 2010

gratitude


We've been doing our gratitude chain again the last two weeks; we have a million strips of cut-up paper and after breakfast we all take turns writing down what we're thankful for that day.  I love this ritual.

Today I was thinking about how grateful I am for my body's resilience.  I've been slowly building back up again, as the nurse told me I could, and it is wonderful (I just hope the doctor agrees with her assessment; I'm going in on Wednesday).  I still need much more rest than I would normally, but exercising again has made such a difference.  Last week I replaced some of my normal "run days" (usually I run 5 days a week but last week I only ran 3) with yoga, which was lovely.  I've forgotten how much I really love that mind-body connection, and it feels soooo good to settle into those deep stretches.  I slept so much better last week with exercising again than the week that I was on bedrest, which was really quite miserable. 

I'm also thankful that my food-making energy has been restored.  We've been eating much more interesting meals this last week, and I think the children are grateful for the cessation in quesadillas.  We ate a lot of tortillas for awhile there, so many, in fact, that Neil dubbed them one of our five food groups.  My house smells like banana bread right now and the freezer is stuffed with carrot-raisin and pumpkin-chocolate chip muffins (thanks to baking all of Abigail's kindergarten snacks at once) and it's delightful. 

To be entirely honest, most days I still feel a little down, a little not-quite-myself, but I'm getting better at overcoming that, I think.  Better at looking for the bright side and focusing on what I really need to do, rather than all that I wish I was doing.  So much of my family's attitude towards the day is based on mine, and I've really been making an effort to foster a more loving and kinder environment.  I struggle with keeping my temper and being patient--oh, being endlessly patient in the broken-record-repeating-instructions that is parenting!!--and I have a long way to go, but I think I've come a long way too.  Sometimes it's interesting to consider the woman I would be if I didn't have young children.  I think I would probably be more successful in the eyes of the world, but I would not be nearly as kind. 

image thanks to kim davis photography

2 comments:

Meghan said...

You're right; being a mom helps us to become a real person. A kind, generous, nurturing, selfless person. Some days, anyway, and it becomes more and more a part of us as the years go by. Of course, some people start out this way, but not me. And I think it's done things for you that the Armani suits and black BMW would have missed.

Neil said...

I admit that learning how to be a dad is a bit more challenging and overwhelming than earning a degree in engineering.

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