procrastinating

So I promised myself I'd start doing some grading tonight (projects are due tomorrow and some students have already turned theirs in), but it turns out that I'm feeling in a blogging mood...so I'm giving myself 10 minutes for some stream of consciousness stuff.

• Nathan is five months old today.  Wow--that's gone fast.  I need to do a post about this, but the short version is that he's eating (baby) oatmeal these days and moved into his crib in Abigail's room this week.  I may or may not have been a little weepy the first night he didn't sleep in our room (Neil, on the other hand, was celebrating and promptly disassembled the bassinet). Nathan still wakes up at 10:30 PM, 1:30 AM, 3:30 AM, 5:30 AM, etc. so I see plenty of him during the night. I'm not sleeping much.
• I took Hermes to the vet yesterday.  He's not doing well.  Yesterday I thought he was dying and I was heartbroken (I held him alone in the dark crying for a long time).  He's a little better today but not much--he was really thin when we brought him home and he stopped eating and became very lethargic.  I've been syringing food & water down his throat every four hours.
• Still working on potty-training with Luke. I haven't been super adamant about it like I was with the older kids because we are SO busy that we're often gone in the morning and he's not great at using the toilet when we're away from home.  He did, however, use the bathroom twice at the library today (our local library has tiny kid-sized toilets, which are way better than the terrifyingly large ones at the elementary school--we spent the morning over there earlier this week and Luke was petrified).
• I love my life and I am so happy with my family, but I am SO overwhelmed.  I have no idea how to keep juggling everything I'm doing.  I've always been able to keep the house pretty tidy & spend quality time with all the kids & work & pursue my own interests--but right now I feel like I'm drowning in good, worthwhile endeavors.  I'm not sure what to cut out (I don't think I CAN cut anything out!) but it's pretty stressful. I wish that I could just spend time out in the glorious fall weather with my kids--but instead we're doing homework, cooking dinner, practicing piano, going to the library, packing lunches for school, doing baths after soccer and trying our best to keep up with what Neil has dubbed Laundry Couch (i.e. the couch where I dump the 5 loads of laundry every day and try to somehow get it folded before bedtime). I don't like how frantic I always feel but I really don't know what to do. I can't even begin to enumerate all the things I need to do (top of the list: do something with the 75 lbs of apples still sitting in my room.  Did I mention we picked about 400 lbs of apples and I've been processing those? And half the trim in my house is white and half of it's brown. And our lawn hasn't been mowed in about a month because Neil has no time & I'm exhausted from running).
• Next week Isaac is having his tonsils removed & it's the worst grading week of the semester AND it's the last week of half-marathon training before I start tapering for the race (i.e. I'll be running 30 miles at the very least). I'm not looking forward to that.
  
  Hmm, this turned into a lot of griping.  Really, I'm happy.  Our children are so delightful and I love watching them learn and grow--they are all such wonderful little people.  Abigail, in particular, is really developing into someone who is so fun to talk with and I love being her friend as well as her mother.  Neil is, as always, my rock and I am so grateful for him and his selflessness every day--I can't comprehend how he keeps giving and giving and giving, but he does.
  
  But still, life is overwhelming. There are lots of big things going on and we're trying to figure out how we balance raising our young family & creating beautiful learning moments with trying desperately to get Neil every minute of work that he can so that we can graduate and hopefully focus on raising our hopefully-still-young family.  Truthfully, all I want right now is to spend a weekend camping with my family & come home to find that my house has been the "victim" of a team of magical do-gooder fairies.  (And I'd really like my cat to live.)

Hermes

So guess what--we finally (finally!! we've been talking about it for the last 18 months) got a kitten!  He is an absolute doll, we named him Hermes (yes, after the Greek god because my children are going through a total mythology obsession right now--which in all honesty has been a lifelong obsession for me anyway), and yes these are the exact same photos I put up on Facebook.  And yes, there are probably another 50 pictures on my iPad of him being really adorable with the kids, but I ran 11 miles last night and I just finished running 5 miles tonight and I need to sleep more than I need to upload new pictures.

Hermes is about 3 months old, but he came to us box-trained (our local animal shelter has a great program where they foster out animals to get them ready for adoption) and he has been soooo amazing.  Not a single accident and he's very quiet at night (Neil did forget to shut our bedroom door last night and woke up 3 or 4 times with a purring cat curled up on his face). He only meows as he's on his way to his litterbox or very very quietly--and just once--if he wants you to pick him up.  Basically, he purrs NONSTOP.  I had cats as a child, but I only remember them purring when we sat down and petted them for a long time--Hermes seems to have a nonstop purr motor operating as he's sleeping/walking around/being enthusiastically petted by Luke.

Right now Hermes is still pretty small and guess what? He LOVES to ride around on shoulders.  Like totally loves it.  Like right now he's sitting on my shoulder wrapped around my neck and purring while I type.  It's very comforting, actually.

Essentially, he is a super sweet cat and we are all in love with him (so far).  Abigail had a really stressful soccer game tonight and came home crying--I was sitting on the couch talking with her and as we were wrapping up our conversation I asked her if she wanted to read (no), if she wanted a snack (no), if she wanted to go play outside (no)...and then I said, "Do you want me to go find Hermes and you can just pet him?" and she said, "Yes!" and sat there petting him and rubbing his ears until her tears stopped.  I think it will be so good for us in so many ways to have this sweet little cat in our lives--it has been really nice for me to have company when Neil is working nights.  I never really thought I'd be the kind of person to fall in love with a pet--come on, I have five kids!  I have so many people to love!!--but I'm definitely developing a Hermes-sized spot in my heart.

Arrr! It be talk like a pirate day!

One of my favorite things to do as a mother is to try to create moments of sheer silliness and fun (the day that we ambushed Neil--on his way home from work--with a giant stash of water balloons comes to mind).  So since today was Talk Like a Pirate Day, I decided we should celebrate.

First of all, I told the kids that they needed to be dressed as a pirate to eat dinner that night.  Juliet got SO into it and dressed Luke up as well (those are boots around his ankles, not pants).  Isaac wanted to be a dragon because he doesn't like pirates, apparently.

Then Juliet helped me to stretch butcher paper out over the table.

And then I poured dinner (a mix of roasted broccoli, carrots, and apples + cheese ravioli (which was gross and I was really mad that the store was out of the tortellini that I like) and grated Parmesan) onto the table.  Normally I would have mixed in some pesto and feta but I didn't want to create a horrible mess.

The kids all asked for plates and forks and I said, "Arrr!  Pirates don't be using forks and plates!  Eat up, me hearties, or you'll walk the plank!"

And that's pretty much how dinner went.  I'd also made a place card for each place with a "pirate name" (like Sharkbait Joe, Cap'n Scurvy Steve, Peg Leg Bill, etc.) and we referred to everyone by their pirate name for the meal.  And, of course, we didn't acknowledge anyone's conversational gambits unless they first said, "Arrrr!"  

Isaac thought it was hilarious and laughed any time someone said something.  And Luke sat there alternately eating and saying "Arrrrrrr!" as ferociously as he could.  And pretty much it was awesome.  Messy, but totally awesome.

week's update

Isaac started preschool this week!  He was soooo excited (and couldn't wait to wear his new Darth Vader shirt, which we stenciled especially for the first day).

His class is doing a rodeo theme this year.  Fun stuff!


I can hardly believe that Isaac is old enough to go to preschool.  He seems so much younger to me--maybe because the girls are getting so big now--but when I talk to him about what he did in the mornings while he was at school, I realize how articulate and decisive he is.  He's still the sweetest little man--in the picture below he was bringing me a piece of dark chocolate and unwrapping it for me.  That's my boy!

 Speaking of sweet little boys...

If you're friends with me on Facebook, you're probably tired of the recycled photos--sorry!  But this one was too good to pass up--I told Isaac to change after church a few weeks ago and I found his shirt, tie, and dress pants in a neat little pile and then saw this:

Neil's parents came into town this weekend and stayed with us for a few days.  The kids loved having the chance to have someone around who was willing to read all the stories I don't like!  (long ago I made a rule that I would read them anything they wanted as long as it wasn't a Disney story--I LOVE reading fairy tales but I don't like the Disney versions--and no more than one Berenstein Bears, Curious George, or Clifford book per day.  Self-preservation.)


We had a really fun time with them--we went geocaching in the morning, ate some delicious Indian food, and then roasted s'mores that evening (I'm hoping they'll email me some pictures since I have no idea where my camera is & I didn't take my iPad on the hike!) I had so much fun playing with the kids on the trampoline as it got dusky and beautiful.

And speaking of beautiful, I love this pergola that Neil built me for my birthday this year!  I'm a lucky girl.

with my baby

I absolutely cannot get enough of this child.

The seven-year itch

Last month my kitchen looked like this.

 And now that same view looks like this.

And my living room that used to look like this is undergoing its own facelift too.  The living room is much lighter in person--kind of a pearly white with green undertones.

I think I’ve mentioned a few times that we’ve been doing some redecorating around here.  When we got home from Utah earlier this summer, I had so much energy and somehow the 2 weeks away from my house made me realize that I was ready for a serious change (probably my sister’s gorgeous new home had something to do with that!).  We've been living here for seven years and we painted everything the first few months that we lived here--I've been looking at these colors for a long time.

So I started sewing and painting up a storm.

Here’s the deal:  I really loved my old color scheme.  Red has always been one of my very favorite colors and I just loved it.  But I didn’t feel like it would be as easy to sell with the red tones, and I also felt like I was ready for something a little more soothing—because there’s lots of crazy in this house.  And I’m starting to really love neutrals.  (And I always hated the oak cabinetry and the brown trim—it was just the idea of changing it that was overwhelming.)

So this is what my house looks like right now.  I know, these aren’t very comprehensive shots and that’s because a) I don’t really feel like styling everything at 11 PM and b) I’m still in the process of styling everything, period.  I like the blues and the whites that I’m bringing in, but let’s be honest—I had been doing reds for 10 years and so it was much more carefully curated.  A couple of months isn’t going to replace all of that (plus I’m not planning on changing the furniture, which is what I REALLY want to change, until after we graduate).  Long story short:  I like the colors more now, but I feel like it's not as cohesive and finished as it used to feel. I still need to do things like lighting and draperies.

Anyway.  Major changes we’ve made around here lately include…

•          Painting the kitchen cabinets & trim
•      Replacing all the kitchen hardware (I ended up ordering most of it online and became very educated about hinges in the process)
•          Painting the kitchen walls
•          Painting the living room & foyer walls & trim
•          Painting bathroom & kids’ hallway walls, trim, & doors
•          Sewing a bazillion new covers for throw pillows (and then freezer paper stenciling them, and embroidering them, and embellishing them pretty much every way I could think of)
•          Carefully painting EVERY formerly red accent in my living room (believe it or not, I even peeled up the vinyl lettering on our last name + family is forever sign so I could change that color too)
•          Giving the kids a giant canvas and letting them go crazy painting it to create a big piece of “art”
•          Making those flower puffball thingies (which I'm really not liking in these photos--maybe I should go back to the cream-colored candlesticks as the bases--I used to have a candlestick collection up there so it just looks weird and bare to me now.  It needs a lot more layers and textures).
•       Painting the fabric papasans (yes, really)--twice because first I painted them gray and hated it.  The blue is still too light but it's okay for now since I would love to light them on fire when we move (I really do not like those chairs at all.  Although painting them means that now they're more grippy and don't slide off the frames every 10 seconds).  If you decide to paint fabric furniture like this, it worked surprisingly well--just make sure you sand it with a very fine-grit sandpaper and then it will feel like leather instead of scratchy craziness.
•         Painting my kitchen floor mat (twice—the first time I didn’t use poly and boy was that a mistake
•     I've done a lot of other projects—mostly things for the walls—but I am tired and it’s time to go to bed.  Another day.  Oh, I did make these really awesome flower pillows for the girls' beds that I thought would be SO darling.  Luke promptly commandeered both of them and insists on sleeping with them every night.  Go figure.
•      And just to be clear, I still have to paint about 1,000 miles of trim/walls.

Life

6:32 AM: wake up and feed Nathan.  Fall back asleep while I'm feeding him--finished my 9-mile run at 10 PM last night and was so cold by the time I got home that I jumped in the shower rather than using my foam roller.  Mistake--aching joints kept me awake most of the night.

8:12 AM: Neil wakes me up and tells me I need to take the girls to school.

8:13: Rocket out of bed in panic.  Throw on a T-shirt, yoga pants & contacts and start frantically brushing the girls' hair, clearing breakfast dishes (bless his heart, Neil fed everyone already), checking lunchboxes for ice packs, etc. Realize that my late start means that we didn't have family scripture study or vitamins.

8:17: Start a load of laundry.

8:32: Snap a quick photo of Isaac (first day of preschool) and post it to Facebook.

8:34: Family prayer. Load up girls & youngest two boys in the van and head to school.  Neil takes Isaac to preschool.

8:55: Back home with the boys.  Start working on breakfast dishes.  Carry on long conversation with Luke--I only understand about half.

9:02: Clean up my room--there are Nathan blankets everywhere and an embarrassingly large collection of pint jars (my preferred drinking vessel).

9:17: Switch laundry to dryer.  Dump clothes in dryer onto couch, where they join the 4 loads of laundry I didn't get a chance to fold yesterday.  Luke helps--sort of.  Start another load in the washer.

9:19: Make a to-do list for the day on my whiteboard--laundry is at the top.

9:22: Feed Nathan.  Luke is miraculously quiet with a book about trains.

9:48: Decide I should probably eat some sort of breakfast.  Drink a quart of water and look around for food. I have a hard time with eggs since I was pregnant with Isaac, so I wash the eggy dishes from breakfast and then roll up a leftover blueberry whole-wheat pancake from yesterday and eat it as I walk around picking things up.  Luke decides it's a great idea, so he picks the blueberries out of another pancake, then wipes his purpled hands on my freshly-painted kitchen cabinets.

9:53: Vacuum.

10:00: Sit down with Luke and a giant pile of books.  Blessed respite.

10:40: Sandwich in some quick grading & responses to student emails with Luke on my lap--thank heavens I did most of the grading last night.  Luke climbs off my lap and takes his diaper off so he can run around naked.

11:00: Get dressed (do running clothes count?) and sort of smooth my hair--time to go get Isaac from preschool.  Wake up Nathan and put him in his carseat.  Drive to preschool while Luke tells me an involved story about how he wants to go swimming at the beach, which at least explains the swimming trunks I found on his floor this morning.

11:30: Arrive home with all three boys.  Nathan wants to nurse & Isaac wants to tell me every last detail from his morning.  Nathan is gloriously poopy from his shoulders to his ankles, which I discover when I take him out of his carseat. I end up standing up over Isaac's train tracks, nursing Nathan, while Isaac tells me about his day.  More laundry.

12:00: Lunch for the boys--Annie's mac & cheese (which I justify buying because it's organic and somehow doesn't feel like regular mac & cheese) & strawberries.  They refuse to eat anything else.  Isaac kindly gives Luke his last strawberry when Luke is upset about the end of the strawberries. Eat four strawberries myself and refuse to feel guilty.  Rather than eating more, I start prepping dinner.  Strike a deal with Luke that if he drinks his milk, I'll give him his paci (oh yes I did).

12:30: Put Nathan down for a nap and start cleaning up from lunch.  My little sister calls and I enjoy chatting with her for exactly twelve minutes before Luke is demanding a nap.

12:42: Read Chitty Chitty Bang Bang to Luke & Isaac while the 3 of us snuggle on Luke's bed.  Sing Luke his songs, kiss his head, and exit.

12:50: Make myself a quick PBJ.  I'm so ravenous and all I can think is protein & carbs.  More water.

12:55: Start folding laundry.  Fold laundry for what feels like forever while I talk to Isaac.

1:23: Halfway through the laundry, Nathan wakes up.  I feed him while the oven beeps frantically at me & I hope that dinner doesn't burn, because there's no way I'm interrupting Nathan when he actually wants to eat.

1:45: Finished feeding Nathan; time to read Isaac some stories.  Try to do a bit of knitting while I'm reading, but Nathan keeps grabbing the yarn and stuffing it in his mouth.

2:15:  Start some baguette dough for dinner with Nathan in one arm.  Fold more laundry while I'm waiting for the dough to knead.

2:25: Put Nathan down for a nap.

2:34: Start running on the treadmill.  My legs are killing from yesterday, but I feel much better as the run goes on.  I'm only doing 3 miles today since I'm still recovering from the 9 miles 16 hours ago.

sometime in there: Luke wakes up and comes in screaming.  I'm desperate to finish my run without Luke waking Nathan up, so eventually I hand him my iPad (a first!) and he scrolls through photos while I finish my run.

3:09: I don't have time to shower before I pick the girls up from school, so I fold some more laundry.  Do more dinner prep.

3:48: Arrive back home with the girls.  Nathan wants to eat and so does everyone else.  Pop Nathan in his swing with his pacifier while I frantically get raisins & peanuts out for the bigger set.  Abigail tells me a story about school that breaks my heart, although she's not upset about it at all.  I respond in the optimistic tone that she's using.

3:52: Nathan fell asleep again.  Hallelujah!  Start the kids on homework, punch the baguette dough down and run for the shower.

3:58: Abigail and Luke have a peanut fight while I'm in the shower.  Not sure how this happened since it seemed like Luke was standing outside the shower howling the entire time.

4:02: I find the peanut fight.

4:04: Start cleaning up peanut fight.

4:08: Encourage Abigail to keep going on her math homework.

4:09: See above.

4:13: Ditto.

4:15: And...ditto again.

4:17: Abigail's finished with her math; I start quizzing her & Juliet on their spelling words (tests are tomorrow!) while I shell out roasted garlic for dinner.  Both girls know everything perfectly and I say a silent prayer of gratitude.

4:25: I start Abigail on the online portion of her math homework.

4:26: Realize I need to roll out the baguettes.

4:28: And pick tomatoes for dinner.

4:29: And basil.

4:30: Nathan wakes up and wants to nurse.  Abigail wants to talk to me about her book club book.

4:45: Somehow it seems like a really good idea to make & freeze some pesto right now.  I put the baguettes in the oven and start on the pesto. Dinner is mostly made so I figure it's okay to spend a few minutes on something else.

5:10: Neil comes home early (piano tonight so everything's moved up) and I realize that dinner is, um, not quite ready.  The pesto, on the other hand, is done!

5:20: Dinner's on the table (heaven-in-a-bowl salad, roasted garlic soup, French baguettes, and creamy Brie).  Juliet leaves the table crying a total of four times. I wonder yet again if I should homeschool her; she won't talk to me about her days at school and I never get good quality time with her these days.

5:40: I start another batch of pesto (in all fairness, this batch was sun-dried tomato pesto and I had to get the tomatoes going before they softened too much, since they were soaking in hot water).

5:55: Nathan gets loaded up in his carseat again, I brush Abigail's hair again, and the three of us head out for her piano lesson.

6:15: Piano lesson is not good.  Abigail knows all her music, but she's obviously bored (story of her educational life--that child is so bright that she's usually a step or two ahead of any instruction, and hasn't learned the manners to match).  I'm embarrassed and apologize profusely to the teacher.  Abigail tells me on the way home that she wants a different teacher and I agree that this is not working.  I feel defeated as we leave because I just don't know how to parent her effectively--how do I encourage without domineering, and when do I push or back off?

7:00: I drop Abigail off at the church for Activity Days and race home to feed a grumpy Nathan. Neil greets me at the door and tell me that Luke used the potty for the first time!  Hurray!

7:25: Nathan is asleep in his bassinet.  I start working on dinner dishes (Neil would normally have them done, but the Luke episode sidelined everything else) and then pack the kids' lunches for tomorrow (baguettes, oil & balsamic vinegar, strawberries, and mixed veggies).

8:00: Pick Abigail up from Activity Days.

8:15: Come home and finish the dinner dishes.  Put away laundry. Chivvy kids towards pajamas while Neil reads a bedtime story. Check backpacks for tomorrow.  Family prayer--the kids are, surprisingly, quite reverent.

8:37: Kids are f.i.n.a.l.l.y. in bed (please note that their bedtime is 8 PM) and I start running the vacuum over the house for the second time today.  It needs to be done.  The kitchen floor needs to be swept again as well.  Neil leaves for the lab again.

8:38: Kids start coming out of bed.

8:40: I give everyone another round of kisses and take away Isaac's light.

8:47: I fill up both (?!) of Luke's waterbottles and move him from the rocking chair to his bed.

8:51: I warn my children that the only monster they should be worried about is the one named Mommy who is really done with the day.

things I still need to do tonight: almost everything on my to-do list for the day, plus more grading, mop the kitchen, clean bathrooms, maybe do some painting.  Likelihood of getting all of those done: 0%.